Thursday, April 29, 2010

Changes

From Bambini

We have made some schedule changes and things have improved a little. We asked our nanny to come at 6am instead of 9am. Being Colombian, she makes fresh coffee every morning. For me, its "go to sleep and smell the coffee!"

The early morning hours are most difficult for me, so we decided to let Maria Del Carmen have those. This was the best idea we have had in three months!

After some difficult negotiation, we have settled on a pumping/Breast feeding schedule. It is just not possible for Barbara to breast feed all the time with her self imposed work schedule.

Now she gets up at 1.30am, pumps and goes right back to sleep. Then she gets up at 4.30am and breast feeds for an hour, then pumps anything left which takes us to 6am when Maria Del Carmen arrives. This allows her to get two more hours sleep and then get a few hours of work done.

This solution is not cheap, but it is worth it. In fact I think I would have sold my vehicle rather than go on the way we were. Instead we returned the new flat screen TV. We don't get a chance to watch it other than when we are eating.

There are a few reasons to own a TV, Dancing with the stars is possibly not one, but Frontline definately is. This week we were glued to the report on the medical risks of Vaccines.

Barbara had mentioned her concern about a couple of them as a result of one of her friends contracting polio from the vaccine. The Father then got it and had to leave the country until he recovered.

On our last visit, the pediatrician mentioned vaccines and, knowing absolutely nothing about this, I asked if it was a good idea to inject rather nasty diseases into brand new babies? He was sympathetic, but clearly thought vaccination was the magic bullet of the 21st century.

We talked about the controversy over the MMR shot. He mentioned the recent retraction in "The Lancet" over a study done by an English doctor showing a link between a protein in the stomach and brain damage as a result of the vaccination

He then cited the 14 statistical studies done around the world that cannot show a correlation between Autism and the MMR vaccination.

So I have begun to read and read. As Frontline mentioned, there are some online sources for information, one that even addresses the conclusions of the 14 studies in detail.

What is clear, is that some people like Rodney Peete and Jenny McCarthey are absolutely convinced that their children were perfectly fine before the shots and regressed immediately after.

The problem seems to be that there is no evidence to link these things at present. All the stories are anecdotal. So what does that mean? Are these parents just the lunatic fringe, or is there something that is not yet understood about the interaction and pre-disposition of your children to Autism.

What is known, is that one in 90 boys gets it! That is a staggering number. For girls it's around half that rate. The increase in this condition has been explosive and no one knows why.

Is it a stretch to imagine that ten years from now we will discover that vaccines we thought were safe were in fact toxic in certain combinations and doses? I don't think so. There are already studies that show problems.

Given how long it took the medical profession to actually like lung cancer and smoking, and how much money is riding on this practice, it is entirely possible that we could be looking at a modern day Thalidomide or Tetracyclin.

While they played a historical role in stamping leprosy and cholera, they were quickly withdrawn. My teeth were irreversibly stained from Tetracyclin a pain killer for prenant mothers touted as safe for years.

I cannot imagine the intensity of feeling that would come from discovering that a vaccination turned me into a heavily medicated, antisocial personality with mental retardation.

On the Frontline show they used very emotionally charged shots of children in the iron legs, and bad cases of chicken pox, but even the articulate doctor they interviewed admitted he was out of action for a year with polio. That could have given a New York prosecutor a hard time. He was obviously completely in charge of his mental faculties. I doubt he would rather be Autistic as unpleasant as that experience was.

We all had Chicken pox growing up. I think my brother had whooping cough too. Barbara had Chicken pox and Mumps. These were not pleasant, but certainly not worth the risk of Autism.

Clearly I have a lot more work to do in determining for ourselves, how we are going to balance all this. We certainly do not want to limit the kids in any way because they have not been vaccinated.

This week Nico got a mild case of flu. He had a blocked up nose for a few days and lost his voice. That was the good news. The bad news was he gave it to me and I had the shivers for a few days.

Interestingly, Luca did not get it, nor did Barbara. We went to some trouble to separate their bottles but did not pay a great deal of attention to it. I thought they would both get the opportunity to build their immunity a little. We kept a close eye on their temperature.

The most difficult moment was when Nico woke up all disconbobulated and with a blocked nose. He got really freaked out and started crying but he couldn't suck enough air in to sustain a good loud scream so he got more freaked out and... well you get the picture.

He looked like he was drowning and it was hard to recognize that this is how babies learn to breath through their mouth!

Both of them have been smiling a lot more. I even played them the Rhino song the other day and they were fascinated for at least a minute or two.

I figure if I sign up for online college and record it, I can play it to them so that by the time they are 5yo, they will know how to file a class action lawsuit in case they have a problem with the vaccine shots.

Nico is very alert and Luca is very sensitive. It's hard not to love them when they fall asleep on your shoulder and look at you with such innocence. Barbara is in heaven and it is a pleasure to watch her. She refers to us crank boo, mellow boo and big boo!

Friday, April 16, 2010

I shouldn't Be Alive

From Bambini


Pictures are here:

There is a television show that has me glued to the box. It's on discovery I think. It's a collection of true stories of the survival of ordinary people who become stranded or have an accident in remote locations.

The show I watched tonight featured two guys that go sailing in a small dingy in Baja California and get caught in a squall. They end up on a small island without food or water in the sea of Cortez.

As they are slowly dying of thirst, their minds start to play tricks on them and they must use every ounce of will power to keep going and hopefully get rescued. Are you getting where I'm going with this yet?

Picture us with sunburned skin and shredded clothes with baby puke stains, badly dehydrated mumbling incoherantly and you have the general idea. In fact it's so bad and I am so sleep deprived I cannot tell you what day it is as I type this.

The main problem is lack of sleep. The graveyard shift is particularly tough between 6am and 9am (when the nanny arrives so Barbara can work). Nico is particularly cranky and yesterday went two hours straight with a fit. Even with earplugs firmly implanted, I was praying for the sea of cortez to hurl myself into, and that with luck I would immediately be devoured by hammerhead sharks.

I find I cannot sleep after 9am and have to wait until noon. Then I can only sleep a few hours before my body wakes up. I try to find a few more hours sleep in the evening but there is just so much to do. I am trying to make sure Barbara gets at least 7 hours sleep a night, as she is breastfeeding and working.

This has become an exercise in time management worthy of a major manufacturing plant. We have had several rounds of negotiations over what time we each go to bed and how we overlap. The worst time is early morning when they first wake up. No matter which one wakes up, he will start screaming and wake the other one. This leads to a race for bottles, daipers, wipes, blankys, tissues, suckers all of which they hurl on the floor as soon as you take you eye off them.

Inevitably one will need changing which means he will freak out at being woken up and having his nice warm smelly daiper torn off to be replaced with wet wipes and a cold daiper. Then even if the other was still sleeping he will wake up and join in. Luca has even perfected the sleeping scream, where he doesn't even bother to wake up.

Trying to keep a lid on the two of them at 0'dark 30 has had me contorted into all kinds of odd positions to keep them both comforted. By the time time Barbara arrives I look like I have completed the six week Army basic training in one night.

Despite all this, we have to put on a brave face as people ooh and aah about the new babies without realizing the work that goes on and try to take those kodak moment pictures that everyone expects to see. Its very hard. We took a few pictures the other day and I look like a zombie at halloween.

The humiliation is complete when others send us pictures of their baby in the cutest poses with all the family looking like they just returned from a two week vacation in Cozamel.

Our nanny was not stepping up and taking initiative as we had hoped. The daipers were not being emptied and she would put the kids to sleep and the read he bible. As soon as she left they would wake up and crank for hours. She could not get the concept so we let her go.

We were referred a replacement and she has offered to come very early so I can go to bed at 4am. She is much more motivated and seems more concientious. Hopefully this will bring some relief.

On a positive note, Athena is doing better but has been badly damaged psychologically. March 18 was the 1 year anniversary of the first confirmed H1N1 case in Mexico. There have been over 17,000 deaths from H1N1. It’s hard for me to comprehend the amount of suffering this virus has unleashed and then having to endure a loss after a painful struggle to survive.

From Johns Blog: I count my blessing daily that Athena is still with us and beat all odds fighting this virus when so many others weren’t as fortunate. The final tally of the damage H1N1 has caused to Athena’s body and mind is still an unknown.

There are 17,000 families without a loved one this year, many of them pregnant mothers, because of a cold virus. We are not among them, and Barbara's immune system is back to normal.